What would Jesus Do today with Dating?
Dating in today's Christian world can be something that is extraordinarily difficult. From lockdown to lockdown and from App to App, the simple ability to "swipe right" has both made dating much easier and honestly, much more difficult.
If "swipe-right" was the easiest way to date then no one would get their hearts broken and everyone would be happy and in relationships. Looking over my friends and family, and even myself, I can tell that this is not true.
Many years ago I was on a website called E-Harmony.com and this was at the beginning of online/social media dating. Looking around it was very difficult to find someone who had the same belief structure as I did and the same moral, family, and religious values that I did.
If the simple and e-dating apps like Tinder were as successful as they claim to be there would be virtually no broken hearts and "hurtful disappointments."
Finally finding my "the one" took a very long time and doing so was a difficult journey that endured with the love of God and through His teachings and Jesus Christ.
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DATING AND COURTSHIP
Dating in today's modern world looks vastly different from what it was even a century ago. Today, we flit and jump from one person to the next, always looking for something greater and better-- always looking at the neighbor and seeing that "the grass is always greener"-- rather than trying to work on the issues and develop something long-lasting.
Courtship is a more biblical process of finding your mate and glorifying and honoring God while doing so and in the process honoring and respecting each other. For, when you respect God and follow His teachings you respect those in your life and those around you.
God designed our desire for intimacy and closeness as the foundation of all relationships and drives for in God's creative work, Adam was not complete until He made Eve.
The goal, is oneness, a closeness that can only be achieved through a strong foundational relationship with your partner and God. Today, many are trying to find the quick and easy way to fulfill this, and that is outside of marriage. That is a relationship that is "counterfeit" because when you hold it up to the God's Light, you see it for what it really is-- hollow, hopeless, and doomed.
BEING SINGLE IS OUR TIME FOR SELF-IMPROVEMENT
Today's society has a social taboo on being single. They make you feel less. Like something is wrong with you that you aren't with someone else. They are completely wrong. Next time someone asks you, "Why are you still single?" simply reply with "being single is a time for self-reflection and self-improvement and evolving to be the best possible me."
Marriage isn't two halves coming together to form a single person but rather, two wholly and complete individual people that come together for a relationship of intimacy and honesty and faith. Being single gives you the time to learn who you are and what you want out of a relationship. It gives you the time to develop the tools you need to both improve yourself and to determine who your best match will be.
It is time to take the time to improve yourself and to invest your being in causes that will make a lasting difference in the Kingdom of God.
I'm not saying to stay single until your journey of self-discovery is complete (as that is a lifelong journey just as much as it is with God). Just-- be more selective with who you let into your life. Don't give an all-access pass to your heart because it is easy to "swipe right" for some immediate intimacy because you are priceless.
I have faith that God will pair me with my partner that He designed for me. For we each have our Match out there. We just need to find him or her (and take the time to do so).
"Take heart." Let your heart take courage and resist following a quick and easy path for the timing of God is not something to be rushed. He teaches us patience. God calls his people to a higher standard than the standard of others. Do not let the fear of failing, make you take matters into your own hand and stray from God's Plan, since God is the ultimate match-maker and He always saves his best for those who are willing to wait and follow His path.